Today is one of those days where I fear I may pass out if I take any more deep breaths. I've already put myself in a mom time-out, put a pink hat on Jack just to get out of the house quickly (so that some energy can dissipate into the great blue yonder), snapped at Molly, and have had to consciously stop doing battle with her to wear a shirt (let me tell you, she's got a sweet outfit on today. Topless for much of the morning, that's my style). The hard part is that I realize that a lot of this is my fault. She's two -- what the hell does she know? Two means being impulsive, frustrated, possessive, fickle, and having a rapidly changing mind. Being thirty-two does not mean I get to do or be those things (but it does mean that I need a cup of coffee before I start my day without being a lunatic. That, unfortunately, didn't really happen today). It's drizzly, chilly, and dark outside -- the universe is {clue dramatic music and be forewarned, there is some hyperbole happening here} so very clearly against us.
Jack also has not felt like being put down today, has spit up and pooped on multiple outfits, and is probably tired of being poked and prodded (and can't get across to his sister that he's perfectly able to roll over on his own, thankyouverymuch) so it feels like a very perfect storm of crabbiness here. What is particularly bad about today is that I think Molly was really hurt when I snapped at her. To see a crushed look on her face for grumping at her made me feel SO badly. Sure, I apologized -- but so did she and I don't even think she knew what she was apologizing for. To hear, "I'm sorry, Mama" from her broke my heart into about 30,000 pieces. Like I said, she's two and she shouldn't really be apologizing because she's just trying to get her needs met. I know that she needs to learn to wait her turn, learn to share, and be patient, but I'm not sure she got the memo on that. She's adjusted beautifully to being a big sister (aside from helping Jack turn over, although she really thinks she's helping) and entertains him, brings him toys, looks for "Buddy Man", and, very helpfully, tells him when he's sleeping. I know that the waiting and patience part is also part and parcel of being a sibling but I also get it's hard to lose being the center of the universe.
Both kids are sleeping, I'm going to attempt to restore some order to our little universe, and cross my fingers for a better afternoon (I'm realizing that parenting is a lot about luck and the right combination of circumstances). If anyone has a time machine they'd like to lend me, though, I'll gladly borrow it. I just haven't decided if I'd rather go backwards and fix things or forward and forget about today. I'm also glad that no one's voting on parent of the year award today. I mean, I know that I'd be a shoo in on most days (sure. right. yup. keep telling yourself that.), but I'm pretty sure I'd have a Jim Rice moment today -- not this time, big guy.
Happy Tuesday?
That's it, she's outta here... in one of the more eclectic outfits (where not all the pieces actually belong to her) that we've managed to piece together.
I'm pretty Jack's thinking that he didn't sign up for this loony bin. What is wrong with these people?!?!?
3 comments:
Hang in there. Lord knows we've all been there - I had one day last week where I literally did five time outs in one hour before I realized that a time out wasn't really effective in that particular situation. Molly knows you love her and ever parent is entitled to a little frustration once in a while. My prediction is that she'll wake up and have forgotten entirely about the pre-nap incident ..... but I hope you have a better afternoon!
I second all of Kate's very well-put thoughts. Thankfully, in addition to being incredibly resilient, these kids are incredibly forgiving (and forgetful). I'm pretty sure you're still in the running for parent-of-the-year, don't worry. And it's refreshing to hear your narrative - we certainly have all been there and it's nice to hear we're not alone! Hope your afternoon improves - hugs from our coast to yours!
I hear ya. We have all been there. Hopefully just by writing this post you feel a little better. It may only be the afternoon out there, but a glass of wine always helps. Or a pint of ice cream. I say you fill up the bathtub with lots of bubbles and the three of you belt out "Rubber Duckie" at the top of your lungs. Hang in there. Having kids make you feel like the hours in the day are too long, yet the years go by too quick :) Love you guys!
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